If you have to say ‘No’ to someone, but want to minimize the damage to your relationship with them, identify the impact of saying ‘Yes’. Help them understand why you are saying no by pointing out the logical consequences of agreement. If they can see the negative impact of Yes, they may alter their proposal […]
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One of the hats that ADR practitioners are likely to be wearing these days is that of coach, and indeed many workplaces around the continent are adopting coaching as a skill set they want their managers or HR staff to have. Even as a mediator, my skill set as an effective mediator includes the ability […]
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A challenge currently facing many people in the world is how to persuade others to come around to their way of thinking. Many people who attend Stitt Feld Handy Group online conflict resolution training ask about effective ways to change someone’s mind. In our virtual instructor-led conflict resolution training, we offer many pieces of advice […]
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An article in TIME Magazine, entitled “How Your Siblings Make You Who You Are”, explains how brothers and sisters affect your negotiation style and skills. My sister actually brought this piece to my attention, when she attempted to use it to take credit for my career in ADR. The article states that on average, siblings […]
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Reciprocity We often hear about random acts of kindness and something inside of us wants to see the kind person benefit in some way. It only seems fair. Some of us even act on this and try to do something nice for the person who was kind, especially if they’ve done something nice for us. […]
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Dealing with difficult people is not simply a skill. It is a leadership skill. Great leaders in business know how to handle difficult individuals. They know how to tackle the problem head-on, resolve any issues, and move forward to continue the business relationship. Business people without these skills will get bogged down in the quagmire […]
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Dealing with someone who talks and will not listen: Dealing with someone who makes personal attacks: Dealing with someone who is stubborn and positional: Dealing with someone who lies or is untrustworthy: Have a Plan If you are worried about starting a difficult conversation, sit down and consider your goals in the conversation. Then write […]
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One useful tip that I learned through a recent mediation that I conducted is that it is helpful to get whatever you can do at the mediation table done then and there. It sounds rather straightforward, but in the heat of the mediation, when the parties are finally at a point where they’re ready to […]
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Many employees find interviews and employee reviews to be daunting prospects. Not knowing how to negotiate a salary and how to advocate for yourself can leave you feeling helpless at the table. Here are some helpful hints when you are in a job interview, or a review meeting with a superior, to help you get […]
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In mediation it’s often helpful to help parties separate intention from impact. Parties in dispute often judge each other, in part, by their assumptions about the other person’s intentions. If the impact was negative, then the intention of the other person was assumed to be negative. This may not be the case. While the parties […]
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Fairness How do you convince someone that your proposal is fair? Fairness is a subjective concept and people have different ideas of fairness. Just because you think something is fair doesn’t mean the other person will think so too. One suggestion is to look to objective criteria, such as comparables. People are more likely to […]
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Competitive Bargainers How do you deal with a competitive or positional bargainer? Someone who takes a position, anchors and doesn’t move? These people frustrate us as we look for the magic formula to cause them to make concessions or show flexibility. Unfortunately, there’s no magic formula. Usually, we try to convince them that they should […]
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Power Power is an interesting concept as it relates to negotiation. We all have a sense of what power is, but usually from examples we can think of rather than because we know the definition. In fact, if asked for a definition of power in negotiation, we probably struggle, and prefer to just give examples […]
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In modern complex work environments, stress has become an inevitable part of the daily routine. We have observed that unaddressed stress can lead to numerous issues, including decreased productivity, increased absenteeism, and a negative workplace culture. It’s crucial for employers and managers to proactively address workers’ stress to foster a healthier and more productive work […]
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Here are some interesting tips for running a meeting from Sam Horn’s book Tongue Fu! (1) One person speak at a time We’ve all heard this one before, but what was new for me, was the suggested method of enforcement: Look at the original speaker and say “Excuse me (name of speaker), let’s wait until we […]
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Conflict is bound to arise in any business. The conflict may occur between co-workers or with a client. An unresolved conflict has the potential to negatively impact the productivity and profitability of any company. Through an improvement in yours or your colleagues’ dispute resolution skills, a conflict is less likely to hamper the day-to-day operations […]
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